Every year I write the kid’s a birthday blog for the past eight years. This blog is a continuation of their baby books. Each year, I reflect on the people they’re becoming and how sad I am they’re growing up. I cry every birthday since about age 10.
Sweet Conner, he hasn’t changed a bit since the day he was born. He never cried unless he was hungry, he’s happy go lucky, very rarely do you see him upset unless he’s fighting with his sister and then you see his bad side.
He’s a hard worker, smart, thoughtful, funny and sweet. I get compliments often on how respectful and polite he is. This year he worked hard to graduated from a local civic program and is taking it very seriously. He has decided to follow in the steps of his dad as a career choice. Now we’re planning for his future career and graduation next year.
I have never shared the ”story of Conner” on the blog. I have shared about Conner, his misdeeds and mishaps, his birth story but never the story behind our decision to have a baby at 21. Also as today is World Type 1 diabetes awareness day, I thought it would be a fitting homage to his grandfather Martin whom he never met.
Marty and I met when he was 18 and I was 17. We got engaged when we were both 18 and planned a two year engagement slated to marry December 07,1996. Marty’s grandma Helen fell and became very ill, eventually we discovered she had a brain tumor in November of 1995 and she passed away December of 1995.
Marty and his dad Martin lived with Helen. She was a caretaker for Martin and helped him raise Marty. Martin Sr., was a type 1 diabetic who was plagued with horrible suffering from the disease. His kidneys and subsequent kidney transplant had failed. He lost both legs and most of one hand to this horrible disease. His heart was very weak and we knew even though he was 46, he didn’t have long to live.
So the day Grandma Helen died, we moved up our wedding to four months away in March of 1996. We wanted Marty’s dad to see us be married.
We lived with Marty’s dad to care for him during our first year of married life. January 1997 Martin lost his fight with Type 1 diabetes at the age of 47. Marty and I were 20 years old and had been married for 10 months. To say Marty was devastated is putting it lightly, it would take him years to get past losing his dad.
In February of 1997, Marty wrote me a Valentines card and made me dinner. At dinner he told me that he was devastated his dad didn’t live to see our children. We had planned on waiting five years to have kids due to our young age. He asked me that night if I would consider having a baby immediately? he said, ” I don’t want to wait any longer, we waited too long already and my Dad didn’t live long enough for him to hold my child.”
So we made the decision to have a baby as soon as we could. Two months later, I was pregnant with Conner. He was born nine months after Martin passed away. I have always thought of this song to describe that year in our lives.
We often wish Martin could have met Conner, they would’ve been best friends. Conner is truly our blessing of 1997 and we’ve always been glad we threw that five year plan out the window. He brings joy and happiness to so many and healed our hearts from grief.
( on world Type 1 day, we can also celebrate that Conner has been the generation of Timms men that does not have Type 1 diabetes.)